Mass and Volume

Someone designed this.

Someone designed this with the intent of it being worn on the human frame. On the bodies of all sorts of different women. Because, that had to have been the plan. To design a dress with the intention of no one wearing it is a bad business model.

According to the ModCloth website, “Despite its unreal amount of volume, however, this fun little piece still flatters the feminine form, thanks to its hidden side zipper and back sash tie.”

Look, they’ve seen it in person. So maybe there’s something I’m missing; a subtlety I have yet to pick up on. But, in my years of dress shopping, never once has a side zipper and back sash tie made a dress with two layers of hoop skirt magically flattering. It’s not even that flattering on the mannequin, and you can stick pins directly into a mannequin to get the perfect fit.

I’d actually love this fabric as an a-line, so it would have a sort of 50s school dance feel to it. As opposed to what it currently has, which is “Mrs. Potts summers at the country castle.”

ModCloth Pump Up the Volume Dress – $74.99

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