Clarifying Creepy 5

I guess another Twilight sequel is coming out soon, with its immortality and giant wolves and obsessive love interests.

But this t-shirt’s taking it a little too far. In case you can’t read the text, it says: “I will keep you in my little vial and you will never escape me.”

Okay, first of all, carrying around vials stopped being cool when Billy Bob and Angelina broke up. But, more importantly, it’s never a good idea to threaten to shrink someone and store them in lab equipment. It makes you seem kind of needy. And really desperate.

I mean, is this really something that needs to be clarified? Because I’m a little worried that the youth of today need this cleared up. First the “Vampires Make the Best Boyfriend” shirt, now this.

So let me state – vigorously – that under no circumstances is it okay to keep people stored in containers like some insane mad scientist. If you’re confused by any of this, please feel free to contact me. Seriously. Don’t be embarrassed to ask, “Is it okay to ask to drink my boyfriend’s blood?”

Okay, you should be embarrassed that the thought occurred to you in the first place, but don’t be embarrassed to get a second opinion on it. This is a no-judgement zone.

… fine. It’s totally a judgement zone. But you need the help.

Forever 21 Love Vial Knit Top – $10.80

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5 thoughts on “Clarifying Creepy

  1. Reply Izalika May 13, 2010 3:59 am

    I feel like you and the internet are stalking and judging me. I often say to people “I adore you, and I want to put you in a little jar and carry you around with me all day long.” I still don’t think there’s anything wrong with that and it’s probably only a matter of time before someone buys me that shirt.

    And I shall wear it proudly. :)

  2. Reply Ally C May 15, 2010 11:51 pm

    LOL I think this is one of those shirts that have writing on it that doesn’t have to make sense. I see a lot of those shirts everywhere :)

  3. Reply Wicked Apr 28, 2011 3:58 pm

    I have actually gotten more guys by exposing my mad science (engineery, really) tendencies than by pretending to be normal. F’r instance, apparently threatening to stick someone’s brain in a jar and hook it up to a metal spider-bot is considered sexy among the male population. Who knew?

    Not that it will ever go through, of course, because I already am in happily cohabiting <3 with my very own mad scientist compatriot-bot… but good data to have.

  4. Reply LV iPhone 6 + Case Jun 13, 2015 7:29 am

    I understand why Apple wanted to fit a better camera into the iPhone 6 – the shots I’ve seen from it so far look spectacular – but I don’t understand why it needed to be bolted on in such a Frankenstein manner.

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