I guess another Twilight sequel is coming out soon, with its immortality and giant wolves and obsessive love interests.
But this t-shirt’s taking it a little too far. In case you can’t read the text, it says: “I will keep you in my little vial and you will never escape me.”
Okay, first of all, carrying around vials stopped being cool when Billy Bob and Angelina broke up. But, more importantly, it’s never a good idea to threaten to shrink someone and store them in lab equipment. It makes you seem kind of needy. And really desperate.
I mean, is this really something that needs to be clarified? Because I’m a little worried that the youth of today need this cleared up. First the “Vampires Make the Best Boyfriend” shirt, now this.
So let me state – vigorously – that under no circumstances is it okay to keep people stored in containers like some insane mad scientist. If you’re confused by any of this, please feel free to contact me. Seriously. Don’t be embarrassed to ask, “Is it okay to ask to drink my boyfriend’s blood?”
Okay, you should be embarrassed that the thought occurred to you in the first place, but don’t be embarrassed to get a second opinion on it. This is a no-judgement zone.
… fine. It’s totally a judgement zone. But you need the help.