The weekend after Michael Jackson died, I went to the Griffith Park Zoo. These two events had nothing to do with each other. It was a miserably hot day, and there was not a lot of shade. Even the animals looked miserable (except the meerkats, because it’s really hard to find an unhappy-looking meerkat. Fact.)

So, given the heat, it wasn’t particularly surprising to see all the giraffes huddled in a shady corner of their enclosure. Or, I thought that was the explanation.

The boy next to me turned to his parents and said, apropos of nothing, “The giraffes are standing in the corner because of Michael Jackson.”

He offered no further explanation, leaving me to wonder what he meant. Were the giraffes in mourning? Were the huddled around an iPhone, reading the latest news on TMZ? Did the kid see the ghost of Michael Jackson in the pen, telling the giraffes what to do?

It was the most confusing giraffe-related incident I’ve ever had.

And then I saw this shirt.

I’m inclined to say it’s two lady giraffes getting busy, but I’m not entirely sure what’s happening, and I don’t want to jump to any conclusions. The pink one might be a male with very long eyelashes, since it doesn’t have hair, but that doesn’t make it any better.

Of course, it could be entirely innocent. Like, the blonde one might have seen a mouse and jumped onto the other giraffe’s neck out of fear (I know, elephants are the ones afraid of mice, but it could just be this giraffe’s phobia). Or maybe this is what giraffes do instead of the rope climb in their PE class.

I am, of course, overlooking the simplest answer: they’re doing this because of Michael Jackson.

Forever 21 Giraffe Crush Tunic – $14.80

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