Short Stitch

Amy posted these to the fanpage, with the comment:

Just thought you’d like to know…f21 is selling jorts. As in, cutoff denim shorts FOR MEN. ummm…

Shorts for men are tricky. They have to be just the right length, lest they become hotpants or manpris. They can’t be too baggy or too tight. They can’t look too crisp or too ragged. And that’s not even tackling the issue of whether or not to wear socks, and are flip flops too bro?

Behold: cut-off jean shorts. Suddenly, all the questions become moot, and the only question remaining is “Why?”

They look so painfully unnatural. And they’re way too short. I’m not looking for those awful long jean shorts that skaters wore in the mid-90s, but an extra inch or two would be nice. I’m just looking for enough extra fabric to pull these out of the bermuda shorts limbo they’re currently in.

Do clothes ever make you feel uncomfortable? Not physically – I mean, when you look at an article of clothing, does it ever make you feel uncomfortable? That’s what these shorts are doing to me. They’re like a 50 year old dude leering at me from across a bar. They’re the guy who stood in front of my table while I was panning for sapphires, making smalltalk so he could look down my shirt.
Basically, Alan from The Hangover would wear these shorts. And that pretty much tells you everything you need to know about their level of wrongness, doesn’t it?
Forever 21 Contrast Stitch Denim Shorts – $23.90
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