Things are pretty crazy these days. The East Coast is still recovering from yesterday’s devastating earthquake. One of the greatest celebrity love stories of our time has come to an end. Bill Clinton is a vegan. Chaos reigns.
It’s enough to drive a person mad.
But before you let yourself get carted away to a room with padded walls, remember that even insanity is no excuse for not looking your best. Fortunately, Malene Birger has designed a pair of pants with the institutionalized fashionista in mind.
These harem pants are ideal for lazy days in the common area, group therapy sessions, or trying to get enough votes to watch the World Series. The extra-roomy crotch is perfect for stashing cigarettes or an extra fruit cup, while the legs are form fitting enough to catch the eye of any cute patients or orderlies.
The only problem might be the tie-waist (belts are a faux pas in most mental health wards), but maybe if you ask nicely enough, Nurse Ratched will let it slide. Sure, she had some control issues, but with a hairstyle like hers, I bet she’s a real style icon outside the hospital.
Yes, these pants are just what the doctor ordered. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go stock up emergency supplies and review some disaster movies. With the way nature’s been acting lately, I might need to brush up on my “running in front of a natural disaster” skills.
I am drawing all my knowledge of mental institutions from two movies, both of which were set 30+ years ago. It is entirely possible that my depiction of mental health facilities might be a little inaccurate.