Please Stop Avril Before Someone Gets Hurt

I ... so ... these are real. People. These pants are real. They once sold for $50. Kohl's seems to think that they'll sell for $20.They have zigzags in black and white. With random bursts of color. I have a migraine just from trying to get my eyes to focus. Can you imagine these in ...

Ripstop Them, Please 1

Oh my god. Cargo pants are back. I had hoped that they would forever be banished to the windows of The Gap, but having now seen them in Lucky and in People Style (dude, it's addictive, don't judge me), it seems that cargo pants are in. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Do we really need that many pockets? It's ...

Hang Low

The night I met my boyfriend, I was in a bar, fending off the advances of remarkably uninteresting men. How did I know they were uninteresting? I used my standard litmus test: tell them that I'm a dude, and I have a penis the length of my forearm. Then I see how they react. If ...

Regarding Sequins and Sparkly Things 3

I like sequins. I don't wear enough sequins, mostly because I get really OC about their falling off, and the ensuing gap in sparkliness. But I really, really like them, and wish I could wear them more often, especially in sparkly dress form. There have been many great developments in the study and proliferation of ...

The Shadow Knows 1

I sometimes wonder if ModCloth stocks really ugly clothing in order to contrast with their otherwise great selection of clothes. Stand as sassily as you'd like, Model. It doesn't change the fact that you're wearing sack pants. Ah yes, sack pants. Pant so ill-fitting, they're intentionally gathered at the waist because of the excess of ...

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