Posts Tagged ‘Forever 21’
Today is a day of great importance: it is 9/02/10. Understandably, anyone alive during the early 90s (or the five teenagers who watch the remake) are in a tizzy over this. Even the city of Beverly Hills is going all-out, with a celebration the likes of which has only been seen in the Math club on Pi Day.
True story: the year was 1994. I was at an all-girls camp on the east coast, and we had to send three letters a week home in order to get Candy Canteen. My counselor confiscated my letters and refused to let me have my weekly sugar fix because – and I quote – “90210 is not a real zip code.”
I had to have the head of the camp show her my records as proof that yes, it was a real zip code.
I guess it’s fitting that the 90s have come back with a vengeance in the past year, just in time for such an iconic date. Walking into Wet Seal has become a surreal experience; much of their stock looks the same as when I first shopped there.
All it’s missing are some ripped tights and a pair of Docs. That would have been my dream outfit when I was 8.
Yup. Seeing them still fills me with a juvenile giddiness that I can only describe as “Oh my god, Snick is starting!”
The 90s are everywhere. It’s hard to escape the shoulder pads and high-waist pants that we all thought had been laid to rest with the advent of low-rise jeans and LFO’s anti-Chinese food diatribe, “Summer Girls.” But the 90s are back, and have been for a while. It’s a truth that must be accepted – the 90s are not just an era any more, they’re an industry.
Tell me you wouldn’t have seen this outfit on an extra in a “Blossom” episode. Pair it with a giant hat, and I think you’ve got a hell of a Halloween costume on your hands.
This 90s resurgence – because this is all about me – makes me feel old. Like, crazy old. The best movie ever made is 15 years old – which means that the movie is the same age as Tai. There are teenagers with drivers licenses who have never seen a map of the Soviet Union. I was in the car the other day alongside a 30-something year old guy who was blasting “August and Everything After” while his two kids played with their iPhones. Kelly Taylor became a teacher at West Beverly. When did we all grow up?
In truth, 90210 was a little before my time – I was born in 1985, so the trials and tribulations of the Walsh clan went over my head. That’s why, to me, what’s most off-putting about this 90s nostalgia is what I saw at Hot Topic the other day:
It was one thing when Busted Tees sold Beets t-shirts. But when a major retailer thinks there’s enough of a market for nostalgia gear – suddenly, I feel bad for rolling my eyes when my dad would hear Cream on the radio and say, “This really holds up. It sounds like it could have been made yesterday, doesn’t it?”
Sorry, Dad. I understand now. I’ll be saying the same thing about Toad the Wet Sprocket in five years.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go watch Clueless and Empire Records to console myself.
Side note: is it just me, or does Reptar kind of look like David Letterman?
Wet Seal Plaid Knit Dress – $16.99
Forever 21 Satin Rosy Skirt – $7.99
Hot Topic Doug Let It Beet T-shirt – $23
Hot Topic Rugrats Retpar Die Cut Backpack – $30
Hot Topic Salute Your Shorts Camp Anawanna Tee – $22
I give Forever 21 a very, very hard time on this blog – to the point where I’ve apparently swayed Elise W.’s opinions of the brand. As she said on the fanpage …
I used to love F21, and still kind of do, but not nearly as much since becoming a fan of your blog. Props … I guess …?
Here’s the thing about Forever 21 – when they’re good, they’re amazing. When they’re bad, it’s almost epic. In a weird bit of timing, I had planned to do this post yesterday with a different lead-in, but the hotel’s internet collection makes dial-up seem zippy. I’m up crazy early this morning (7:30 am), so the wifi’s not too sluggish and I can actually post.
So that they may be pleased and the gods of shopping smile upon me, I’m going to offer Forever 21 my unemployment check as a sacrifice. Here’s a bunch of stuff I plan on buying (or, in the case of the jersey dress, have bought), from Forever 21.
I love jersey surplice dresses. They’re so damn easy – I’ve worn this the last couple nights to dinner, and it’s crazy comfortable. The jersey’s really, really soft. I’ll be honest, if not for the fact that my brother would have made fun of me, I probably would have worn it to sleep.
I’ve been flirting with the Sequin Dress with Keyhole Back from Alice+Olivia for ages now. This is pretty much an exact knockoff of the now-retired black version. The biggest difference is about $450.
Again, a dress very similar to a designer dress I loved but couldn’t afford – this time, the Domino dress by Diane Von Furstenberg (Cameron Diaz wore a pink version in What Happens In Vegas – I’ve never seen the movie, so I have no clue why I would know this).
It’s a sparkly miniskirt. Enough said.
This has a very J.Crew feel to it, with the pintucked ruffles along the neckline. It might not work with my chest, but it’s cute enough to try.
With the volume of clothing Forever 21 turns out, it’s inevitable that they’ll have a lot of crap. But I will say this: the stuff that’s good is unbelievable. I’ve bought dresses from them that have lasted a good two years now, with frequent wear. Most of my basic t-shirts are from there, and they’ve lasted for ages.
Point is: Elise, don’t lose hope. Wait two weeks – odds are, they’ll have entirely new stock with at least five things you’ll love.
Forever 21 Fab Jersey Surplice Dress – $12.50
Forever 21 Peep Hole Sequin Dress – $27.80
Forever 21 Classic Double-Knit Dress – $17.80
Forever 21 Glamorous Banded Skirt – $19.80
Forever 21 Ruffled Pintuck Top – $14.80
Amy posted these to the fanpage, with the comment:
Just thought you’d like to know…f21 is selling jorts. As in, cutoff denim shorts FOR MEN. ummm…
Shorts for men are tricky. They have to be just the right length, lest they become hotpants or manpris. They can’t be too baggy or too tight. They can’t look too crisp or too ragged. And that’s not even tackling the issue of whether or not to wear socks, and are flip flops too bro?
Behold: cut-off jean shorts. Suddenly, all the questions become moot, and the only question remaining is “Why?”
They look so painfully unnatural. And they’re way too short. I’m not looking for those awful long jean shorts that skaters wore in the mid-90s, but an extra inch or two would be nice. I’m just looking for enough extra fabric to pull these out of the bermuda shorts limbo they’re currently in.
Do clothes ever make you feel uncomfortable? Not physically – I mean, when you look at an article of clothing, does it ever make you feel uncomfortable? That’s what these shorts are doing to me. They’re like a 50 year old dude leering at me from across a bar. They’re the guy who stood in front of my table while I was panning for sapphires, making smalltalk so he could look down my shirt.
I should not be posting this dress.
It’s a perfectly nice dress. Not my style, but I don’t hate it. Even the giant rosette isn’t that offensive to me. In fact, if not for the following picture, this dress never would have made it onto the blog.
Only Forever 21 would look at this dress and think, “Oh, hey, you know what would totally sell this? A giant bow perched atop the model’s head like a moth trying to nest.”
The bow is larger than the model’s head. I don’t even think I’m exaggerating here – it appears to be as large, if not larger, than the head upon which it is perched. I’m not even sure how the photographer fit both the bow and the model into this shot. The fact that the model’s head is still upright is a testament to the strength of her neck muscles.
Yes, it’s an absurdly sized bow that mere mortals cannot make work. In all my months of blogging, there is only one who has worn the giant bow and escaped unscathed.
Behold the Hardest Working Model at ModCloth, in the image that earned her the title. Her cool, steely confidence radiates from her. It wilts the bow atop her head as she forces it into submission. Hers is a power wielded by only a select few, an ancient magic that we may never fully understand.
So learn from her, Forever 21 model. You will be faced with such absurd accessories time and again if you continue to model for them. Your only hope is to find the Hardest Working Model at ModCloth and beg her to let you join the Model Monastery, where you can work toward your own Accessory Enlightenment.
Forever 21 Radiant Spiral Rosette Dress – $27.80
A few months ago, I posted a Forever 21 bag that was clearly stolen from Vanessa Abrams. Although I was right about a mugging gone awry – unfortunately, not with Dan – it seems I did not properly assess the Abrams/Forever 21 situation.
Apparently, they didn’t steal her purse. She’s been working along side them, designing a line inspired by what I will politely label her “unique” style.
A portion of all sales will go to opening a new shelter for the homeless cat veterans that roam the streets of Brooklyn.
The other portion will go toward putting Georgina and Dan’s illegitimate lovechild through Montessori school. Although Dan wanted to support the public school system and not introduce his child into a world of privilege, both he and Vanessa felt it was important that the toddler be able to express itself through fingerpainting and self-righteous documentaries.
Forever 21 Vibrant Ethnic Beaded Top – $19.80
Crop circles: they’re not just for fields any more.
Scientists are unsure of what this is trying to tell us. The placement of the design makes some think it symbolizes a fertility goddess, drawing the eye to critical anatomical points. It’s also possible that this is some sort of a legend or map, with the starbursts representing different intergalactic waypoints.
Of course, my favorite theory is that it reads, “Glargock the Terrible Wuz Here.”
Although no dead cattle has been found in connection with the crop circles, there have been several instances of mutilated leopards.
I will continue to follow this story as it develops.
Forever 21 Crinkle Studded Dress – $32.80
